Of course, for those of us that engage in the "Vancouver is nuts" and "the property prices here don't make any sense" discourse, Melissa's comparisons don't offer surprise. Nonetheless, her message is articulate, creative and poignant.
For me, zucchini or courgette has always been an entirely unsubtle outlet for my (not so) inner conflict between England or Canada. So, inspired by Melissa and with a healthy dollop of my own spin, I reinforce the message of absurdity by comparing Vancouver to.... York.
York? I can hear you ask it. Hear me out! Let's look at the comparison between these two places. York has been declared, in a Daily Mail article (and based on some entirely scientific study), the "most beautiful city" in England. It's also "where most Brits would like to live." Ask any Vancouverite what is the most beautiful city in Canada or where most Canadians would like to live and they are certain to tell you that it is Vancouver.
Comparing beauty to beauty is one thing. What are you likely to complain about, were you to live in either city? Surely it's the rain of the west coast or northern England? Well, they are both wet to be sure. York gets more than 25 inches (!) of rain a year. Despite Environment Canada indicating that Vancouver gets more than 62 inches of rain a year, any Vancouverite will tell you that it's a statistical anomaly and if you just lived here you'd see that it doesn't rain any more than it does in York. Or New York. Or Toronto. Or Calgary. Especially Calgary. Did you know it snows there? It NEVER snows in Vancouver.
I can hear the cries of protest. Rain-schmain they say. You can wear a coat (or a mack, if you prefer). It's all about the sun. Haven't your seen our beautiful city on a lovely, sunny, winter day? They may have a point. The average of 4.2 hours of sunshine per day from November through March blows away the 4.1 hours you'll get in York, but I think getting on the same page here, don't you?
I could go on to compare the championships won by favourite city sports teams (it's a quick comparison... and, by accounts, identical), or average income, or number of restaurants per capita. But really, it would all confirm that Vancouver and York are practically "twin cities" and, once this realization hits the mainstream, I am sure the relevant Chambers of Commerce will see right to put that process in motion.
Yet to return to the original comparison, you realise that there is no comparison. Let's have a look at the cheapest detatched family home on the west-side of Vancouver today:
That's a beauty. Incredibly, this house has 6 bedrooms. Claims that "it has been well cared for" remain unsubstantiated, but they do admit to the kitchen being renovated 15 years ago, which suggests a moderate amount of wear. Worry not though, because the basement "features a new kitchen and bathroom and can be up to a 3 bedroom suite"!
Wow, you can almost imagine the light that pours into that suite through the front window there.
Wait!
Don't imagine, I'll give you a sense:
And that new basement kitchen? Go on, then:
Well if this house isn't a bargain at $1,138,000, perhaps you don't understand the market.But, really, what could you get in our sister city of York?
As it turns out, you might get a "well proportioned accommodation including excellent reception rooms and generous bedrooms." That sounds nice, doesn't it? Replete with Victorian heritage features, this is what you'd get:
In fairness, it doesn't have a basement, leaving you with a living room (or lounge) entirely above grade. You'll have to put your subterranean dreams aside to imagine the pain of this living room:
It's not entirely fair to compare a "brand new" kitchen that you'll get in the Vancouver option, but if you can overlook the shabby nature of this kitchen (and the fact that there is only one kitchen), it helps to complete the comparison:
And where does this leave us? The exchange rate is always a bit of a difficult thing to work with. Going with the Bank of Canada exchange rate, today, the asking price of £695,000 comes out to $1,099,281... round it up to $1.1 million. Mind you, there are only a handful of houses going for more money in York at the moment.
Must be the complete lack of sunshine in York.
