Caleb Joseph Fitch

Suddenly, we're a family of four. Suddenly (and someone distressingly), we no longer outnumber the children. I think it is the craziest thing about having a baby. You come out of the hospital with one more person than you went in with. I still haven't got my head around it.

We went into hospital around midnight on the 21st. The lead-up was largely uneventful (at least for me). Ange had been having contractions all week, though she impressed upon me that they weren't real. So, despite 'fake' contractions, we had visited with friends, gone shopping, I had gone to work, we had hosted Opa, stayed up late to watch the Flames, and generally not changed much about our lives. On Monday, as Ange took Anna to her Music and Dance (MAD) class, her water broke. Still experiencing only 'fake' contractions, we had lunch and mused about how to go forward with Anna being at nursery.

At this point, I must interject with an acknowledgement about the support we've been given over the past weeks. The pregnancy has been a bit worrying for us in only one way: how do we manage with Anna when we know so few people well enough to impose. In the end, our worries were needless. Our friends in Southampton (60 miles away) came through with offers to come up, despite the hectic and busy lives they lead. Hilary and Nick, who were so kind to us when we first arrived and whom we see regularly, also offered to come and help look after Anna. Work commitments were more difficult for Hilary, as she works at Ange's school (a boarding school). Very kindly, both Emma and Ceri from my work offered to come down to help. Neither are close to us. Emma had offered at work one day. I pointed out that she would likely have to be at work. Emma smiled at Ceri (our supervisor) and said simply, "Not to worry. I'll just call in sick." Grace and Richard and Joyti and Aleen also offered to help. My sister offered to come out from London if it were her days off. In the end, it was like an olympic volunteer call in Calgary. We've been really touched by the kindness of both the offers to help out with Anna and more generally to support us. I've not even acknowledged many of the people who have volunteered help.

In the end, however, we sought help from Beth. Beth is one of the most generously kind people I've ever come across in my life. I know her from work, where she is in charge of events at the University. Beth seems to know and be on friendly terms with nearly everyone at the uni. It's amazing. Anyway, Beth went on maternity leave back in December after giving birth to a lovely little boy called Spencer. Spencer is one chilled little man: he takes it all in stride and hardly ever makes a fuss. From the outset, Beth has been so supportive. She single-handedly saved us a fortune when she loaned Ange two bin bags of maternity clothes. She made up the most generous bag for both Ange and the new baby... and, of course, got presents for Anna so she'd not be left out. She's also loaned us a moses basket and a number of bits. Then, when she heard that we were having trouble finding someone to look after Anna when Ange went into labour, she offered to be our on-call baby-sitter, night or day. As she was on maternity leave, had a flexible schedule, she was mobile, and gold with kids, we committed to looking to her when the time came.

We phoned the hospital to tell them the water had broke but the contractions were only those devious 'fake' ones. They asked us to come in. So, with Beth on call and we called her. She charged out from Wantage to look after Anna. Once we had had our lunch and Anna was comfortable with Beth, we wandered into the hospital. Somewhat frustratingly, after hours of waiting, they were quick to send us home after a quick examination.

When you're imposing on someone like Beth, this created a problem: what next for us? Ange suggested dinner and dancing to spur on labour. We went home. Beth went back to Wantage. Hours later? Yep, real contractions. Beth came back from Wantage, arriving just before midnight and we went back to the hospital.

Saving everyone the details, it will suffice to say that horror stories about the NHS did not apply to us in any way. The midwives were fantastic. Professional, competent and very, very supportive and helpful. With no complications this time around, a little baby boy was born at 7:59am. Caleb Joseph Fitch let out a little cry before snuggling contently with mum. The rude shock of the outside world stuck him for the weighing on a cold, plastic scale (where he weighed in at 7lbs 6oz) but he has otherwise been remarkably content.

Caleb at 2 hours old; Dad with no sleep in 30 hours:


It has been fun re-running through the little things you so quickly forget. For instance, it would probably take having a kid to appreciate the excitement around the changing colour of pooh. The realisation of just how small a newborn is, is also funny. There are the clothes that are clearly labeled newborn, which are so clearly designed for 13lb 'newborns', but which we had nonetheless put out for him because we were none the wiser 5 days ago.

Anna is adapting. Beth was a star with her. Our house had been transformed the time we were away. The lounge was a giant bed, the duvet and pillows out across the floor. Dolls and teddies were put to sleep everywhere. It was a great start for her to have so much fun. She cuddles Caleb occasionally, but is generally trying to come to terms with the emotions around sharing her parents. She hasn't asked for him to go back yet and you can see her showing slightly more interest with every passing feed, cuddle and interaction. I think what they need to do is go visit a castle together. We'll get on that.

Anna and her brother, Caleb: